Leggings: A Stylemma

Three hours later and the paint still wasn't dry.

As I sat at the breakfast bar, nail brush in hand, foot on stool, I had something of an epiphany; leggings, with their cosy fabric and stretchy fit, are really quite useful creations.

It may seem that I have caught on to the genius of leggings quite late, but this is not the first time that we have met. There are definitely some photos floating around in the pre-Cloud world that show me with gappy teeth, a poker-straight bob and floral leggings. However, it was the early nineties, and I was about five. At that age, anything that wasn’t a My Little Pony, Barbie or Spice Girl just slid under my radar.

What is it about leggings that has suddenly struck me as so fantastic? There are so many answers. I think the crux of their appeal is that they are comfortable like pyjamas, pretty like tights and warm like thermals. They also make me feel vaguely sporty, as though simply by wearing them I am mastering yoga and running marathons while getting my five-a-day and drinking gallons of green tea.

However, for all their obvious perks, there are some definite perils lurking behind the inviting exterior. One of the reasons I was so reluctant to give this ever-popular wonder-wear a chance is that I have walked behind far too many girls who either don’t realise that their leggings are completely see-through, or don’t care. As multi-purpose as they are in the confinement of the home, leggings will never replace trousers when it comes to greeting your public. No, never. And no, jeggings, the bastard love child of leggings and jeans, don’t count either.

I have also cringed in sympathy for women whose leggings have taken a perfectly shapely leg and drawn big, neon arrows pointing out all its flaws. I look at my own perfectly shapely legs and immediately see the donut, brownie and cupcake that the spiteful little devils will highlight. Then I put the leggings back on the shelf and buy a cardigan.

Where do these issues leave leggings? Preferably safely hidden under a skirt or suitably long top. If, however, they must be worn as trousers, they should join the likes of Christmas jumpers, oversized band t-shirts you just can’t throw away, and (shudder) onesies, and be enjoyed only within the confines of your own house. Embrace leggings of all colours, shades and prints, and rejoice in the freedom of movement and soft caress of cotton, but for public welfare and your own peace of mind, keep what lies beneath to yourself.